How much stupid can we fit in one thread?

[IByte]

Beans are healthly

 

[480sparky]

There's a picture I wanna take but I don't know if I should use my 10mm and shoot it at ISO 100, 1/100 sec and f/11.... Or my 1,000mm, ISO 25,600, 1/8000, f/22.

Whaty'all think?

 

[mishele]

^^^^ ISO seems a little high but what do I know.

 

[weepete]

Well, your friend is wrong and an idiot.

He needs to buy a Binford 5000 series with the off camera flamethrower. Set the WB to roaring fire setting and bounce it off the floor at a 13.412angle on to the nearest black wall (so the charring of the beams is not noticed after they leave. Of course you could allways try and remove it in post with Pyroshop 6.7 but it's best to get it right in camera) remember that shutter speed needs to be set to § and freeze motion by using an apeture of 8/5.

Sometimes you can get a bad colour cast off the skin when Satan appears, so make sure you switch your style menu to dark. Needless to say that whatever brand Lens you use needs to have a coating of unicorn horn and the apeture made of the cervix of a virgin, and will generally cost your soul.

 

[snowbear]

I like to selectively color the backgrounds on my pseudo-sepia-toned, landscape-orientation, up-the-nose portraits. Oh, and place a big watermark on them so nobody steals the pix.

 

[terri]

I'm going to get drunk.

 

[Josh66]

I'm going to get drunk.

I'm like a 6-pack ahead of you.

 

[dbvirago]

Kathy, maybe you can help me with a bride I shot for. I was supposed to shoot the ceremony for a $100 and give her a CD at the end of the night. She calls me up the next day all hacked off about the CD I gave her. My opinion is if she already had Led Zeppelin's greatest hits, she should have said so up front. I told her if she wants a CD with her wedding pictures on it, that was $2500, but she was just being unreasonable. What do you think?

 

[snowbear]

It's OK if the focus is soft, the horizon is tilted, the highlights are blown out, the shadows are black, and the sun flares obscure the subject -- it's art.

 

[snowbear]

I was thinking about starting a wedding photography business. What kind of camera should I get?

I started mine a cuppa months ago - what lense do I need?

 

[mishele]

I'm going to get drunk.

It's party time!!

 

[dbvirago]

I heard mirrorless was the way to go, but after I pulled the mirror out, the viewfinder is black. Do I need to clean it?

 

[pgriz]

If off-camera flash is good, then off-camera lens is better, no?

 

[480sparky]

I wanna start taking pictures. Do I need a camera?

 

[Josh66]

If off-camera flash is good, then off-camera lens is better, no?

That actually is 'a thing'...
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